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Today I will explain what to do when a girl ignores your texts.
When she's not really saying no, but she's not really saying yes either...
To turn this:
Into that:
That's what happens when you know what to do when a girl ignores your texts.
You'll be able to win back lost situations.
And stay tuned, because in this article we are going to see concepts such as what to do when a girl ghosts you.
But not only the situations where women "leave you on read".
I will also explain more advanced concepts such as frame control over texts.
Or what to do when a girl beats around the bush.
And even solutions for when girls change topics right when you're about to ask them out...
After this article, you will know exactly what to do when a girl ignores your texts.
Disclaimer: This whole article only applies to women you already talked to before. If you're texting a 'difficult' woman for the first time (on dating apps for example) see this article instead. |
In this article, we're going to go in-depth on 3 super-common problem situations:
Let's get into it.
1 - She Ghosted You
We'll start with the classic scenario:
You sent a message to a woman and she didn't answer you.
Maybe it's because she's busy or because she's just not interested.
Point is, the conversation is dead right now.
It'd be useful to know what to do when a girl ignores your texts like that right?
Well, there are only 2 possibilities here:
She stops answering when you invite her on a date
She stops answering you in the middle of the conversation.
Let's see that in detail.
Pro Tip: It's not an exact science and sometimes a woman can be interested but she has too much work or personal problems, and meeting men is not a priority. I recommend that you always try to restart the conversation properly at least once. |
She Ghosts When You Ask Her Out
If a woman doesn't answer you specifically when you ask her out on a date, that's the most obvious situation:
She's not interested (or available now) and you can next her (for now).
This situation is pretty rare because if you're following my texting system you already know how to filter time-wasters before you get to ask girls out.
Either way, here's what it looks like:
Plain and simple.
We had a lengthy conversation before, over the span of a few days, after meeting in real life.
And she complied with everything...
Up to when she actually had to commit for real.
And then she bailed.
Why Do Girls Talk With Guys If They Aren't Interested?
There are many, many reasons why and here's a non-exhaustive list:
She is bored
She feels lonely
Her mood changed
She wants attention
Another dude came in before you could make a move
And my favorite one:
She was too shy to say 'no', so she said 'yes' up to when she had no other option but to ghost.
Honestly, as a man, you're better off not trying to worry about it.
And only focus on what you can control:
Behaving and communicating in an attractive way.
Now let's see what to do when a girl randomly ghosts you in the middle of a conversation.
She Ghosts In The Middle Of The Convo
Here it's a little different:
Either she wasn't interested and she was only talking to you because she was bored.
Or she was interested but you weren't able to make a date happen fast enough.
In this case, either she thought you weren't assertive enough, or another man asked her out on a date before you did.
If you're having trouble leading your conversation to a date I highly recommend that you check out my Texting Cheat Sheets here (it's free).
Bonus: She Ghosts Because Your Text Game Is Terrible
There's also a third reason why women stop responding.
And that's when the way you write and text shows too much insecurity.
Sadly it's very difficult to figure that one out on your own.
And you'll be left not knowing what to do when a girl ignores your texts because of it.
So the best thing you can do is to sign up for a text game coaching with me, to get me to pinpoint your mistakes for you.
And figure out why your texts turn off women who would otherwise be into you.
You can register here for a free consultation.
2 - She Sends You Fake Answers
Now I want to talk about this moment when a girl replies with an emoji.
Or you're asking her a question, and she gives you a one-word answer.
I don't know about you...
But for me, it's the same as if she hadn't answered at all.
Because it doesn't move the conversation forward.
That's why I call this kind of answer a "fake" answer.
In these cases, you have to make her understand that you are not the kind of man who wastes his time on text conversations that go nowhere.
Skip The Bullshit
It's necessary to show her that you only agree to have a conversation with her for the purpose of arranging a date.
Not to entertain her when she's textin' while poopin'.
If she doesn't want to meet up and go have a drink with you, no big deal!
But you must do everything you can to know her true intentions.
The earlier, the better.
So that you don't end up wasting days texting a girl who never intended to go on a date with you to begin with.
Don't Be Afraid To Break Rapport
If she's sending you lame answers you must call her out.
Tell her that you have noticed that she does not seem very interested.
And that you will stop talking to her if she does not want to continue the conversation.
Just like I did with this girl I met last week in the mall for example:
Does this seem too harsh?
Remember, we already met, already established we somewhat liked each other.
And agreed to keep in touch through texts because of it.
Sending such a text is just to make sure her apparent interest is real.
Which wasn't actually the case...
Since in the end, it turned out she had a boyfriend.
But texting in an assertive way will help you figure out uninterested women quickly.
Instead of texting for days with girls who had no intention to date you whatsoever.
And just wanted male validation.
Should You Burn Bridges With Uninterested Girls?
Definitely not.
If the conversation ends now, it doesn't mean she can't be available or attracted to you in the future.
But there is a huge misconception here and I feel most guys don't get that right.
Enforcing your boundaries does not destroy your chances with a woman.
Figuring out if you should move on NOW does not mean you can't persist next month.
Here's an example of enforcing boundaries and skipping the bullshit:
Here's how to skip the BS:
Tell her that you're interested in her but you believe she doesn't feel the same, and so you're about to move on.
And this example is burning bridges:
When you burn bridges, you just tell a woman you're not interested in her.
There IS a difference.
Most women will bail when you tell them that you're not interested and burn bridges.
Pro Tip: Sometimes "burning bridges" can even get women to come back and qualify to you (like in the example above). But that's very random so I don't recommend you use it as an actual way to flirt with girls. |
But (interested) women will not bail when you break rapport.
So don't be afraid to hold your ground.
Rub Women The Wrong Way
Okay, a little bit of a provocative title here but bear with me.
It will actually make you appear less attractive if you avoid breaking rapport and keep chasing a woman who always deflects your attempts at making a date happen.
It just shows her you're weak and needy.
Just because "you don't want to rub her the wrong way" in the hopes of getting your biscuit wet.
Don't do that.
In fact, most men are literally afraid to tell a girl to stop her bullshit.
Because most men believe they've got only 1 shot with a woman or else she's gone forever.
But this couldn't be further from the truth.
Here's an example of a conversation that I restarted with a girl who was too busy to reply the first two times.
To be honest those days I don't pursue girls anymore.
(Unless she is a one-in-a-thousand, smoking hot, diamond-in-the-rough kind of gal).
Because I prefer to be out meeting new women instead of texting old matches that are only half-interested.
But I wanted to share this screenshot just as proof that getting ghosted once is not the end.
If you want more I wrote a full article on the top 3 ways to restart a Tinder conversation here.
Attraction Is Not A Choice
If you've been watching my content for a while you know that female-to-male attraction is not a choice.
It's a result of :
Who you are
How you behave
How much perceived social value you have to her
Letting her know how you're going to handle your "relationship" with her has nothing to do with her level of attraction.
If anything, it actually makes women like and respect you more.
Heck, here's an example of a girl I was really rough with:
End of the line: either she finds you attractive as a man or she does not.
You telling her to not waste your time WILL NOT change that fact.
(... Just make sure to not be rude or disrespectful because that would show a lot of insecurities instead.)
But it will save you time and let you focus on girls who you can date NOW.
Turn Mixed Signals Into Clear Signals
Here's another example of a girl I met in the bar last month.
She was really, really all over me.
We verbally agreed we'd text the next day to go on a date together.
... And the next day she forgot all about it.
One night she was all over me, the next day she forgets about it and ghosts me.
What the hell am I supposed to understand from such strange behavior?
Well, I actually don't have to.
Because breaking rapport solves that situation.
If I get a negative, I know she was not interested and can focus on other girls.
If I get a positive, I get a date.
Either way, I'm winning.
And you will too if you handle it that way when a girl ignores your texts.
If she's really interested she will stop sending you fake answers once you break rapport.
And you will be able to lead the conversation to a date again.
3 - Handle Girls Who Beat Around The Bush
Finally, I want to talk to you about the kind of situations where a woman will answer you.
But in reality, her answers will ignore your texts.
And I have a strong screenshot example of what to do when a girl ignores your texts like that right below.
Control The Frame of The Conversation
In short, it's when you lead the conversation somewhere.
But the girl you're talking to leads it somewhere else.
See how I was leading the conversation somewhere with my opening line.
But then she tried to turn it around on me.
Women do this for a variety of reasons:
For the fun of having a guy wrapped around her finger
To test a guy's confidence
Innocently, because they are just too easily distracted
And when that happens, you cannot let it slide
Because more often than not, when a girl leads a conversation, it's not toward what you want (a date).
It's important that you do it
Lead with Assertiveness
Sometimes girls will get hesitant when it's time to make the date happen.
This is when you must know what to do when a girl ignores your texts.
You must make sure to be assertive.
For example, if ask a woman to have coffee with you.
And she responds by telling you a story about the last time she had coffee with her friends.
Totally ignoring the fact you just asked her out.
In other words, you lead the conversation somewhere, but she changes the topic.
In this case, you will have to be assertive.
Here is an example in which I was assertive before she had enough time to derail the conversation:
I can take back control of the conversation in 2 easy steps:
Address what she said in a SHORT sentence.
Lead the conversation and change the topic immediately.
Lead Her Through the Conversation
Basically, you want to be the one deciding what topic is discussed.
And never stay on a topic that isn't useful to the seduction process.
Which is why you will often hear me say that:
"Whatever a girl says is irrelevant."
Because you're supposed to be the one controlling and leading the conversation to your desired outcome.
And if you ever lose control of the conversation for too long, that's a problem.
You must regain control of the conversation to show her that you are talking to her for a reason:
You are talking to her to see if something romantic between you is possible.
Get a Date or Get Rejected
Controlling the frame of the conversation is particularly important when you're making your move.
And you must know what to do when girls ignore your texts, especially when you ask her out.
For when she's beating around the bush too much.
You need to make it clear to her that you want to see her on a date.
Your mission here will be to get an answer.
Even if it means:
Rubbing her the wrong way
Upsetting her
Getting her to reject you
Either she says clearly yes to you, and you have an appointment.
Or she clearly says no to you and you have an answer that allows you to move forward serenely.
Because here's the thing:
If she rejects you because you want to know whether she is willing to go on a date with you, she wouldn't have said yes anyways.
And on the other hand:
If a girl wants to go out with you she will make it simple for you to ask her out.
So don't be afraid to pursue a clear answer.
Never Settle on a Maybe
To illustrate I want to show you an example of a recent conversation I had with a girl I met in the mall.
We talked a bit, she asked for my contact, etc.
Then came the time when I asked her out.
Her reply?
Totally ignoring me asking her out, she asked if I remembered her. (Duh?)
When that happens, it's very important to double down on what you asked.
Do not let her take control of the conversation, and do not let her beat around the bush.
Remember, you must get a yes or a no.
But "maybe" isn't an acceptable answer.
And if no matter what you try she still doesn't give you a clear answer...
It's safe to assume that means no.
Solve Objections to Get Dates
That's what to do when a girl ignores your texts when: you must break rapport like explained above.
And if you do it right and she's actually interested, most of the time she'll explain why she is beating around the bush.
In this case, it will be your job to talk to her and find a solution.
For example if she's busy this weekend, figure out her schedule and ask her out on a date the following week.
IMPORTANT: Do not mistake an objection for a sign of disinterest.
For example, have a look at this screenshot below:
Objection or Lack of Interest?
To know what to do when a girl ignores your texts, it's important to understand why women do what they do.
It's impossible to know 100% for sure, and that's always a bit of a gamble that might turn out to be a huge waste of time.
But that's just how dating is for men: it's about taking calculated risks.
And making a properly educated guess will let you even the odds in your favor.
My best guess here is that it's only an emotional objection, not a lack of interest.
To know that, we've gotta look at the hints in her profile and her previous behavior.
From her bio we know her English is a bit broken, and that she's traveling in Bangkok.
And from our recent conversation, we know that she's at least a bit invested in talking with me.
In the end, it's reasonable to assume that she's a shy Russian girl traveling by herself.
And it makes sense that she's shy and afraid to meet English speakers.
In fact, she's literally telling me what she needs for me to meet her:
To solve the emotional objection, and deal with the fact that she's shy and has poor spoken English.
To put it in other terms, it seems to be a lack of comfort more than a lack of interest.
Pro Tip: Girls are emotional and gentle creatures. Do not try to convince them and force your way through. Change her mood, not her mind. |
In the end, solving objections is all about understanding how women feel and showing some empathy.
It really is easier than it sounds.
It might work, or she might become even more difficult when you try to solve objections.
Which is what happened with the girl in the example above:
And after dodging the topic 3 times, she ghosted me forever.
So It Doesn't Work?
A while back I made a video in which I handle over 5 logistical objections over texts from a girl who liked me, but who apparently was very bad at planning her life.
Eventually, I got her to come directly to my house for a sexy sexy date.
So you see that it really is a gamble, and that can be a huge waste of time.
(But when you make it work out you really feel like a sleek love gangster.)
Only Pursue When She Seems Worth It
Every time you're texting a girl, you're spending TIME.
And that's your most valuable asset in this world.
So remember that dating is a numbers game and that it's all about taking calculated risks.
Every time you meet a new woman you are gambling your time away.
Of course, that would be avoided if women overall weren't such suckers for male attention, and some of them wouldn't spend so much time leading us on.
(Seriously, that girl before asking me if I want to check her butt out to then refuse a date? smh.)
But it is what it is.
So make it easy on yourself.
And make sure you're following a proper dating apps texting system to waste as little time as possible.
I recommend you persist only if you really find a girl really attractive.
And by the way, this goes for real-life encounters too.
Ideally, you should meet so many women that you don't have to bother dealing with women giving you objections.
Check out my video on abundance VS scarcity if you want to know how to create this kind of abundance for your own dating life.
Be Persistent
Overall the best thing to do when a girl ignores your texts on dating apps or on social media is to be persistent.
Just make sure to be persistent with the right kind of gals.
This article showed you how to send texts to girls in a smooth and charming, non-needy way.
I know it's difficult to hold your ground when you like a girl and you don't know what to do when she ignores your texts.
So whenever you need, come back to this article and use the real-life text screenshots I shared with you as an inspiration.
And One More Thing!
Knowing what to do when a girl ignores your texts is one thing.
But I know that many men have difficulties texting with girls in the first place.
I prepared a FREE guide with Cheat Sheets that are extremely easy to navigate.
So that you can use them on the go when texting girls that you like.
Click below to claim it!
